How to Resolve Conflict With Humility

team-conflictRecently I had the opportunity to lead a breakout session at Lifeway’s Kids Ministry Conference 2012 titled "The Non-Confrontationalist’s Guide to Confrontation."

There are three reasons why you want to lean into conflict, the first two of which I already have spoken:

Now, I will address reason No. 3.

The Impact of Humility

Micah 6:8 says, “What does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness and to walk humbly with your God.”

Humility is one of the greatest attributes of a leader. And the right response to conflict has a way of accentuating our humility (or lack thereof).

There are two essentials to humility: honesty and empathy.

Leaders have to be willing to identify with the frustration of a team member (empathy) and sincerely speak to the challenges a frustration causes (honesty) before they can help the team member see the value of moving toward a solution.

As a leader, I can help someone move beyond conflict toward a solution simply by identifying with what they are feeling.

How many times do people simply want to be heard?

Humility is stopping long enough to listen before offering a solution. Humility is the ability to simply say, “I’m really sorry. I know that’s frustrating.”

The moments when I leap from problem to solution, I don’t get very far unless I get the other person to leap with me. I get them to leap with me when I pause, listen and identify. Nine times out of 10, when someone feels they’ve been heard, they’re more willing to drop their offense and embrace a solution.

Next, I will finish this series with "4 Steps to Success for Conflict Resolution."

Gina McClain is a speaker, writer and children’s ministry director at Faith Promise Church in Knoxville, Tenn. For the original article, visit ginamcclain.com.

Get Spirit-filled content delivered right to your inbox! Click here to subscribe to our newsletter.

Help Charisma stay strong for years to come as we report on life in the Spirit. Become an integral part of Charisma’s work by joining Charisma Media Partners. Click here to keep us strong!

Dr. Mark Rutland's

National Institute of Christian Leadership (NICL)

The NICL is one of the top leadership training programs in the U.S. taught by Dr. Mark Rutland. If you're the type of leader that likes to have total control over every aspect of your ministry and your future success, the NICL is right for you!

FREE NICL MINI-COURSE - Enroll for 3-hours of training from Dr. Rutland's full leadership course. Experience the NICL and decide if this training is right for you and your team.

Do you feel stuck? Do you feel like you’re not growing? Do you need help from an expert in leadership? There is no other leadership training like the NICL. Gain the leadership skills and confidence you need to lead your church, business or ministry. Get ready to accomplish all of your God-given dreams. CLICK HERE for NICL training dates and details.

The NICL Online is an option for any leader with time or schedule constraints. It's also for leaders who want to expedite their training to receive advanced standing for Master Level credit hours. Work through Dr. Rutland's full training from the comfort of your home or ministry at your pace. Learn more about NICL Online. Learn more about NICL Online.

Charisma Leader — Serving and empowering church leaders