Self-pity is destructive. Feeling bad for ourselves makes a bad situation worse, and the longer we linger in self-pity, the longer the situation lasts. In fact, we often sabotage our own success when we feel sorry for ourselves.
Self-pity keeps us stuck in the past or present and will not allow us to see a hope-filled future. It blocks us from what could be based upon what was or what is. As followers of Jesus, however, we must remember that God is the "Great I AM," not "the great I was" or "the great I will be." If we are breathing, there is hope.
We often feel shame when bad things happen to us or we make bad decisions and don't like their consequences. Self-pity can grow out of the soil of shame that shame if we do not deal with it properly. Shame signals that it's time to change. Not dealing and responding correctly to shame results in self-pity, and not dealing with self-pity can be costly.
Self-pity, self-bitterness and self-hatred lead to self-destruction. If you are struggling with this right now, ask Jesus to help you. He always hears a sincere and humble heart that reaches out to Him for help. Just know you are not alone, and there is hope.
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God is omnipresent, which means He is there when you cry. The psalmist even says He bottles your tears. He is there to help. Allow the wisdom you find in His Word guide your thoughts, words and actions, and you will not stay stuck in your sorrow.
Such self-pity is worse than a boarded-up, run down neighborhood. There is no life or shelter there. Ask God for help, and He will be there. He is both life and a shelter for the hurting.
God often sends His help in the form of things we don't want to hear. Listen anyway. Absorb His instructions, and make the necessary adjustments so you can break free and help others. Remember this: You can't help someone with something that you are in bondage to yourself. If hurt people hurt people, then free people free people, and it was for freedom that Christ set us free (Gal. 5:1). 
Adam LiVecchi is the senior pastor of Rescue Church and the founder of We See Jesus Ministries. He is also the author of Go Preach Heal. You can find out more about the ministry and connect at weseejesusministries.com.
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