How honoring your spouse can turn your marriage into the most remarkable and rewarding experience of your life and ministry
Sometime back, I—being a loving, sensitive husband whose whole ministry is based on the concept of honoring others—was talking to my wife, Norma, on the phone. In the course of our conversation I asked, “What do you need from me that I’m not giving you right now?”
She responded, “You don’t know how to honor me.” Naturally, I laughed, assuming she was joking. I thought, “You can’t be serious!” I said, “That’s a good one! But what do you really need?” And she said with all seriousness, “No, I’m not kidding. You don’t know how to honor me.”
Honor Is a Diamond
Obviously, after all these years, we still need to work at this idea of honoring each other. And it is work. In my mind, honor is a diamond. We started out with a rough, raw stone. And over the years, I’ve made several major cuts and polishes, turning it into a beautiful gem. As far as I’m usually concerned, I’m doing a great job and it’s ready to mount and display. Norma, on the other hand—because she knows me better than anyone—realizes that there are still some rough surfaces, and she sees them all every day.
Prepare your church for a 2012 breakthrough with a corporate fast in January
For several years now, many in my church, Free Chapel, have joined me in a 21-day fast to seek and honor God in January for the new year. By starting each year with a corporate fast, we have found that God meets with us in very unique and special ways. His presence grows greater and greater with each day of the fast. Without fail, He always shows up.
Corporately fasting in January is much the same precept as praying in the morning to establish the will of God for the entire day. I believe that, if we will pray and seek God and give Him our best at the first of the year, He will bless our entire year. “But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you” (Matt. 6:33).
Short Season, Lasting Effect
Fasting is a short season that produces a lasting effect. Out of 365 days in a year, 21 days is not that long to take a break from your routine and experience a fresh encounter with God. We fast corporately as a church at the beginning of every year because that short season sets the course for the rest of the year.
Avoiding three common traps will help your marriage not just survive
In the beginning, Karen and I were lay members of the church I now pastor. I worked in my family’s electronics and appliance business until one day, the pastor of our church asked me to come on staff as a marriage counselor. Karen and I had been leading a large Bible study, and many couples in the church had been coming to us for counseling.
So in August 1982, I joined the staff of Trinity Fellowship Church in Amarillo, Texas. My official role was marriage and pre-marriage counselor. Ten months later, the church’s senior pastor resigned and I was selected to take his place. Within a year, I’d gone from selling appliances to leading a church with 900 members. I wasn’t prepared, to say the least.
Karen and I had a strong marriage before I went on staff, but the burden of ministry had taken its toll on us almost immediately. After I became senior pastor, it intensified. I made a lot of mistakes as a husband and father. I saw the negative effect those mistakes had on Karen and our two children.
Ten keys for building rock-solid relationships that go the distance
Believe it or not, 85 percent of Americans still get married. Why? Because God created us that way. At the core of who we are, we long for safe, loving, committed relationships. You don’t have to look very far in the Bible to realize that He also wants to bless our love and marriage.
What’s troubling today is that the majority of couples eventually break up. Research estimates that between 40 to 50 percent of today’s marriages end in divorce. If you count couples that separate but don’t divorce, the statistic is even higher. The snowball effect? Tragically, one in three children now live in single-parent homes or do not live with their parents at all.
Behind pasted-on smiles and closed doors is a lot of brokenness from love gone bad. As a pastoral counselor and marriage and family therapist, I’ve sat and talked with countless clients, and over and over again I hear the same cry of the heart: “All I ever wanted was for someone to love me.”
Examining the pastor’s role in mentoring business leaders
When Jesus turned over the tables of the money changers and chased out the dove sellers from the temple (see Matt. 21:12), He also launched a discussion among church and business leaders for centuries to follow.
The relationship between church and business ranges from the simple, “Would it be OK to place a brochure for my business in your lobby?” to the more complex, “Would your business donate materials to build a new gym for our youth?”
A slippery slope exists in the relationship between church and business. The primary issue seems to balance on the fulcrum of doing commerce in the church and receiving support from local business for church budgets. As church budgets continue to cope with declining revenue, the tipping point becomes less obvious.
From recruiting to reproducing, here’s how to lead passionate servants into effective ministry
The volunteer is a unique hybrid—almost an employee and not quite a friend. Volunteers don’t get paid, yet they perform services of their own accord that benefit the local church. They are not co-workers with the paid staff, yet a bond of mutual ministry is often formed. Friendships can develop between volunteers in the pursuit of mutual service, but that is not the goal of the volunteer.
If a senior pastor understands who potential volunteers are, what they want from volunteer service and how they can be developed for effective service, 50 percent to 80 percent of a church’s staff needs could be filled—by volunteers!
Who are potential volunteers?
Anyone who shows up is a potential volunteer. The mom who attends youth group with her teenager to keep an eye on the kid should be greeted, signed in and welcomed. At the end of the service she should be asked to pour soda at the refreshments table.